Are you taking responsibility for your own life?

Category: Article or Blog Published: Friday, 22 January 2016 Written by Sarah PJ White

Responsibility. It’s something we all feel we have on a daily basis, from bringing up our children to our work-related tasks.

It’s therefore little wonder that we can get a bit tired of all that responsibility, tired of the pressure it produces and the onus on being there for others. However, we still forge ahead with that responsibility, regardless of how we may complain about it – so why then, when it comes to our own life, do we tend to step back from taking the same level of persistent responsibility?

Using outside factors

No matter what level of religious or spiritual belief you may (or may not) have, we find it all too easy to reference how fate, destiny and luck all have control over the direction of our lives. If it’s good, they’re smiling upon us and, if it’s bad – they’re punishing or looking down on us.

To further compound the problem, we also blame those around us, for their part in causing our life to be the way it is! We blame them for not knowing what we think and feel, for not understanding and for not helping – when we’re not even knowing, feeling and helping ourselves!

What it really means

However, the simple fact is this – we control how our life goes. We control whether it feels fulfilling or empty and we control how others affect us.

The need to use outside influences as our controller, simply means we are stepping back from taking responsibility for our own lives. We can then take a passive role and find ourselves reacting to the situations we find ourselves encountering – rather than acting on our own will and creating the life we want.

Learn to take responsibility

So how can you start to take responsibility for your life and start taking a more active role in its outcome?

#1: Stop blaming others

As the saying goes: the buck stops here. It stops with you. Other people are reacting to their own situations, experiences and thoughts – the state of your life probably doesn’t even occur to them!

#2: Acknowledge what’s happening

Become aware of what is going on in your life. Not just the events, but how you’re reacting too. Acknowledge how you feel and think, what you like and dislike, as well as getting a clear picture of the facts around your life at the moment.

#3: Have no judgement, only acceptance

When you look at where you presently are, what things are happening and how you feel, don’t judge them – just accept they are as they are, at this moment in time. Remember, accepting them doesn’t mean resigning yourself to them – it’s about accepting they are there, at this moment.

#4: Change your mind-set

If you want to take responsibility, you need to start with your mind-set. What do you want to believe, moving forward? Do you want to be a passenger in your own life or the driver? If you want to be in control, accept that you have to start making decisions. Stop using language that dictates you have no control of what happens in your life, such as ‘that’s life’, ‘it’s in my genes’ and ‘it’s because I’m male/female’.

#5: Take consistent action

Moving forward, make the decision to act on your feelings, thoughts and emotions. If you want to do something, do it. If you say you want to do something, do it. But taking action also means being active – actively monitor your language and terminology, actively watch your actions and reactions and vocalise your thoughts and feelings.

 

If you want to take responsibility for your life and your happiness find out more here

Image courtesy of sean824/Dollar Photo Club

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